Tuesday, 6 December 2011

@phil Unit 1 Essay

Unit 1 Essay Assignment Completed

1 comment:

  1. Hi Amrit - good to see this up here - but there are a number of issues you'll need to fix prior to submission;

    1) Your introduction isn't an introduction as recognised as part of an academic assignment. Your introduction has a specific job to do.

    a) State the subject of the assignment.
    b) List the research sources used and reasons for using them.
    c) Outline brief order of points (i.e. what subjects your discussion concludes.

    Structurally, it seems that you actually spend less time talking about Van Helsing than your introduction would suggest; you've got lots of content about wolf symbolism more generally - you'll need to try and blend the two strands together a little more successfully.

    Perhaps more problematically is the incoherence of some of your sentences - can you ask someone to proof-read it for you - or maybe involve Gaby? You absolutely need to look at your sentence structure - and their sense.